Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
