Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
My vagina is officially offended.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Randomize
