so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize