after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
