I'm going to jail i love you
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
The power of my boobs compel you
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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