its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
