It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
