Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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