I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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