Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
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