her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
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