it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
If I die, sorry about rent.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
