??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
