it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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