I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize