Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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