I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
