HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some magic done to my vagina
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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