is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
All I want is dick and wine.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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