I hate all girls vehemently.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
