3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
