Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike