paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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