how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Oh god it's open bar.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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