All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
All the doctor said was why
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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