you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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