Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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