My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
