he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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