pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Say something about gay babies.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
