Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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