but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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