is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
