I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
