Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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