I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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