just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
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I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Success! We fucked roommates!
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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