I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
