i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Randomize
