Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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