Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
