cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
