I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
