Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
