And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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