My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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