I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
