im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
