You work out of a Hotel?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
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