I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Randomize
