just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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